What's the Best Way To Break Up?
Is there one 'best' way to break up?
Breakups are sad - very sad. They're painful, no matter what side of the breakup you're on.
They're complicated... but then again, sometimes, they're painfully UN-complicated.
The truth can be staring you in the face longer than you want to see it.
What truth? I like to think of it in this way:
Do have the overpowering urge to be in his arms?
Or is that the place you dread?
If you dread that, what's the reason... because you want to be there, but don't want the problems that go along with it?
Or do you dread it because you do not feel that compelling, overpowering urge to be close to him?
If the latter is true, then a breakup is only a matter of time (or else, months to years of arguing over things that aren't really the point).
If a breakup is inevitable, is there a "best" way?
Yes... the "best" way is often a clean break.
Am I saying you should not be friends? I'm not saying that at all. But that can wait.
When a breakup happens, no matter what side you're on, the best thing that both of you can do for yourselves is to take at least a month without seeing each other. No long phone calls, no emails if possible.... out of respect to BOTH of your feelings... out of respect to the fact that, no matter who broke it off, you both deserve to start anew and move on!
It's very hard to move on when you're still constantly in touch.
It's also hard to get back together effectively when you're constantly still in touch... if that's your goal.
Many other relationship advisors recommend at least 30 days of NO contact.
A clean break IS the most respectful way to break up, BOTH ways.
For the one who did the breaking up, it gives that person time to fully OWN their decision and its consequences.
For the person who was broken up with (pardon the awkward English), it shows faith in that person, not pity, that they have the capacity to live a full life anyway. They're not going to fall apart without this relationship.
If you're the one who is on the "receiving end" of a breakup, this is the best advice you can get. Whatever your Significant Other does, go ahead and take that MONTH or more, and end the contact.
This gives you dignity. This captures the interest of the person who broke up with you - they can't help it.
If you have practical reasons to be in touch, keep it brief and businesslike. Go on quickly.
Don't be the last one to leave the conversation or encounter. Be the first one to end that quick meeting. Very important!
A clean break is the best way to end a relationship, because no matter what happens after that, it saves valuable time. Your time matters so much. If you're apart, you have to go on. Don't stay in the past.
You never know what will happen in the future, but going on reaffirms your life in the NOW. Your *self* is all you have to work with, and your *self* deserves this honor.
This is Bob Grant on breakups:
Bob's books could be called a "Crash Course in Understanding Male Psychology That Quickly Puts YOU in Control... Without Him Ever Knowing"!
I get a LOT of emails from readers who tell me that they have followed my emails for years and that Bob Grant's work has made a huge difference in meeting the love of their lives and, yes, getting married.
Bob Grant's programs and my programs have definitely resulted in many HAPPY love lives, and that makes me happy!
I have been telling you about Bob Grant since 2006!
Bob's books and programs are truly loved by my readers.
Here is Bob Grant on breakups: Enjoy!
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Have a great day, and keep your Flirt on!
Author of "Hard To Get - The Timeless Art of Conquering His Heart"