How To Handle The Slow Fade
Has the Slow Fade ever happened to you?
It's not easy, because it sneaks up on you.
A man starts seeing you less and contacting you less, but he has a reason. He's very busy. Someone is in the hospital; or he has a work emergency or a big project that's going to take up a lot of his time.
After some time, you realize that his emergency has passed. Yet he's still not around!
He's in contact with you, but much less frequently. There's notably less talk about SEEING each other...
This happened to Marie, a reader. Her Moment of Truth came on Valentine's Day.
The romantic man she'd been seeing; the one who was madly in love with her a few months back, had been in contact less and less. Their times together were fewer and fewer.
On V-Day, what happened? She got an EMAIL from him. The email subject line said "Happy Valentine's Day." The email read, "I just wanted to take a moment to wish you a wonderful day....." and a few other innocuous lines. Nothing whatsoever about seeing each other.
Marie was fuming. "He said, 'I just wanted to take a MOMENT. A MOMENT to wish me happy Valentine's Day?? What happened to Mr. I Can't Get Enough Of You??"
Marie's experience is a perfect example of the Slow Fade. The worst part of the Slow Fade is that it takes a while to recognize it.
We women have probably been guilty of doing this exact same thing to guys. So we can't get too huffy about this. It's also a lesson that it's more respectful to just level with someone.
So what can you do when a formerly interested man is now doing the Slow Fade on you?
1. Resist the temptation to respond to his emails or texts right away. Emails can wait a few days. With texts, you can wait an hour, and then send a quick, nice-but-not-gushy, brief reply.
2. Accept the possibility that it's over and start thinking about your plans to move on.
3. When you do reply to his email or call, don't volunteer too much information about anything. Don't start telling him all your trivia that you normally might share.
4. When you reply to him or talk again, treat the relationship like it's now a friendship. That is the message that he has been sending you. Assume that this message is real because... it is.
5. When he asks to see you again, don't jump at the chance. Take your time, and limit your times together.
6. This one may or may not apply to you: Start reminding yourself of ALL the reasons you were holding back from HIM when he was much crazier about YOU. It's possible that this relationship was never meant to be.
7. Don't take things too seriously with him. Start moving on. Nothing's stopping him from trying to win your heart if he wants to! Your first responsibility is to take care of you!
So, what will happen when you do these things?
What happens to most readers who put this into practice is that the tables get turned.
By taking care of yourself, you also get his attention and interest again. What's more, when things get started again, he will be pursuing you.
This advice truly works. To find out more, about how to get a man to chase you, check out my program "Hard To Get."
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Have a great day, and keep your Flirt on!
With love,
Mimi Tanner
Author of "Hard To Get - The Timeless Art of Conquering His Heart"
www.hardtoget.com